One of the things that I unironically miss from my youth is coming home from band practice or playing basketball, marching straight to the freezer and dumping an unreasonable amount of Totino’s Pizza Rolls onto a plate and nuking the hell out of them, leaving behind little puddles of cheese that would stretch from the plate to the roll and leave them filled up with questionable bits of meat. Those somehow greasy, always molten hot but still kinda frozen in the center little mouthfuls of dough and fat always made me happy, so finding a gluten free pizza roll is something that is high on my list of things to do.
The first one that I have tried, or at least could be considered as a replacement for the rolls I loved so much is from Real Good. They have a line of chicken poppers in multiple flavors, and I considered them as a potential replacement. How did the chicken wrapped balls of pepperoni and cheddar do?
After reading the cooking options, a choice to be made between baking and microwaving, and remembering the Lovecraftian like horror-show that came out of my microwave the last time I did this, I opted to bake. I had a feeling the little balls of chicken would explode in the microwave, and while that appealing to me, the resulting clean up didn’t seem like it would be a ton of fun. Getting them out of the bag, putting them on a baking sheet and cooking for 6 minutes, flipping and cooking for 6 more seemed like it would be in my best interests.
When I came in to flip them, I was surprised to see that not a single one of them had broken open, to ooze filling out. The end of the cooking cycle gave me the same results, and soon I was in my room ready to try them.
The chicken shell had browned nice and evenly, I thought that they were coated in something, but I don’t think that is the case, I just think the outside was meant to brown, if that makes any sense at all. Remember these are made with chicken and Parmesan cheese, so they are but a simple wrapper. You could smell the pepperoni from the outside, which was a good sign for me, because nothing is actually worse then the tasteless red little bits of pepperoni in a pizza roll.
Taking a bit, I expected to have molten lava ejected in to my mouth, and was pleasantly surprised when it seemed to be more pepperoni than cheese.
The pepperoni was nice and flavorful, it honestly overpowered the cheddar cheese, which was there, but not hugely noticeable. I need food makers to understand that it is okay to use sharp cheddar. It’s more flavorful, and it is a better cheese. The chicken shell for what it is, out of the oven, was tender and moist. As I ate more, and they cooler they got, they started to be a little less tender and moist.
There were 9 in the package, with a serving size of three. Eating all 9 in one sitting was a mistake, as they were very filling, and it filled me with regret, because I woke up the next day wanting more, but didn’t have any more, because I ate them all already.
Frowns
These by far were the best product from Real Good that I had tried in my limited time here reviewing gluten free products. While I was looking for a pizza roll replacement, I sadly didn’t find one here. I found a snack product, that due to the ingredients was closer to a chicken nugget than a pizza roll. That quest will continue, however, having something to use as a snack, or an appetizer is something really nice, and I am happy to have given this one a try.
Rating
Real Good Poppers: Uncured Pepperoni and Cheese 4 our of 5
Pros:
Little bites are substantially more filling than a pizza roll
Easy to cook, didn’t explode out of the shell, making clean up a breeze.
A suitable fancy chicken nugget
Cons:
Pricy. Almost 6 dollars for nine nuggets
Cheese is overpowered
Chicken gets less moist as the meal goes on.
The Gluten Free Mage 